P was supposed to come over yesterday, but he ended up getting here this morning. I stayed here all day waiting on him too. He is really sweet, though, because he walked a long way at 2 am to come see me. He looked like he was really tired and dead on his feet, but he came anyway! We just sat around and talked for an hour or so, just kickin’ it. Then he left because he was tired and had a long walk ahead of him. I think that it was sweet, but I don’t know whether or not he likes me as a friend or something more. I just got a weird vibe from the whole thing–a lot of tension. I don’t know, maybe it’s just my low self-confidence rearing its ugly head. I sometimes feel like no one likes me, not really. Even though I know it’s not true, it makes me sad. Anyway, maybe we will remain friends and maybe we will be something else. Only time will tell. I don’t want to push him about it, you know? I’m trying to be mature about the whole thing, but I don’t know what a mature relationship is like. I had very few immature ones! I don’t know what experience P has with relationships; I never really asked him. Maybe he thinks I’m childish. Oh well, I can’t change that, so moving on.
My roommate is finally here! I am, so far, really happy with the pairing, but she’s only been here a few hours and we haven’t spent that much time together. For those of you not at Purdue, we have this evaluation to fill out w/ our roommate to set some ground rules about the room, general stuff like use of property and having guests over. We haven’t done it yet, but I don’t expect there to be any problems w/that. I am so ready to get to know her, study together (she has two of my classes), and live together. I have had a roommate before, but I didn’t get along with her on a friendship level; we just took up the same space. I hope this time things will be different. Maybe they will, maybe they won’t, but I tell you, you missed out on some stuff that year. If only I’d known about this then…hmm.
Anyhow, she seems laid-back and not too pushy so we will see how it goes. Well, I won’t let my insecurities get the best of me. I have a long day tomorrow. Look for the first day of class one…sure to be interesting.
Hey come back with my self-esteem!,
P.S. Peace Love and Hair grease. Read the footer
Stay tuned for another misadventure of this almost grown woman…until the next time, keep it true, no matter how many feelings truth hurts!